If you’ve read my other posts you know that my relationship with my boyfriend Cody hasn’t always been easy. We’ve fought and argued. A LOT. We both have struggled with anger issues and instead of listening to understand, we listen to reply. It never gets us anywhere but we’re both stubborn and always think the other is in the wrong. There’s been plenty of times where each of us have taken something the other has said the wrong way. We’re terrible at communication. But you know, relationships are hard. Team work makes the dream work, right? So we’re working on it while God’s working on us too.
So Cody recently had a pretty bad day. He was sick all morning, had to work late, played two softball games and ended up getting hurt. I told him I’m putting him in a bubble. But anyways, we had a conversation at the end of the day and even though I wasn’t trying to, I aggravated him with the things that I was saying. And I told him to stop being a grump. So he had his sassy pants on and said some things and instead of me responding back in the same tone, which I normally would have done, I just took a step back and decided it wasn’t worth it. That’s another key thing I’ve learned. 99.9% of the fights and arguments we have? They. Aren’t. Worth it. I mean is arguing with him after he’s had a really rough day worth damaging our relationship? Definitely not. Most of the things we get irritated about are minor and meaningless in the long run. So I just told him I was sorry he had a bad day, reminded him there was no reason to take it out on me, but told him I loved him and goodnight. His response was quick and short and I figured that’d be the end of that. BUT I was wrong. Like the Lord is so good at doing, He convicted his heart. Only a short time later he texted me again and apologized. Said that he loved me and thanked me for all I did. Now Cody is not the affectionate type. My love language is 100% words of affirmation and he’s not the best with words. I don’t get those sweet, I love you so much and you’re awesome, texts from him. Until recently. When I mentioned before that I see changes in him everyday this is part of what I meant. The number one thing I struggle with is feeling loved and appreciated by him. And until now, he’s never really tried to understand that. I’ve prayed for him to show me love the way I receive it, even if it’s not what he’s used to or likes doing. And it amazes me because it’s another prayer God has answered. If someone would have told me that we would be where we are today, I would have laughed. Until I learned to trust God I was full of doubt. Because I knew I couldn’t do it on my own. We needed help. So my point is that things get better. Whether it’s a relationship you’re struggling with, be it romantic or not, or you’re struggling in school or with a job, whatever it is. It gets better I promise. I know it’s hard to see right now. I was once in that place, but when I turned to God and let him take over and confessed to Him that I needed help, a weight was lifted off my shoulders. He will provide for you. He will give you the desires of your heart. You just have to let Him in.